I listen to him.
Validate and point out his positive assets
Notice discrepancies and inconsistencies,
Voice them,
I challenge his automatic thoughts,
Doubt his inner critic,
Guide him through deep breaths,
Question the origin of his stories,
And ask him for evidence of his assumptions,
But I cannot change him.
I cannot quieten that voice in his head,
Cannot keep him from pulling his hair or intellectualizing,
Cannot make him any more present
Or any less apprehensive of the future.
I am merely a sounding board,
a mirror, a witness.
I see him and I let him correct me , When I can’t see him precisely That is all I can do.
That fear he holds or has a hold
Over him-
It is neither mine to grasp
Nor to relinquish.
Only he can let go or break free,
So I myself have to relinquish
Any hopes or thoughts or things
I wish I could help or change
And I hope in this moment,
In this instance,
He knows it is okay to feel
And to cede control here,
In this encounter,
I hope he can encounter
Himself just as he is.
And maybe, I too
Maybe, I myself
Need to cede control
Of any views or circumscriptions
Of how I thought life would be,
How I thought I might be.
Maybe, this encounter
Is just as much teaching
Me presence, as it is him.